26 THINGS FOR MEN NOT TO SAY ON A FIRST DATE.

Just for a bit of light relief – enjoy !

  • "Finally, someone else who doesn’t
    care about their looks !"
  • "You’re paying for all this, right ?"
  • "My mum has that same dress."
  • "My dad has that same dress."
  • "I have that same dress."
  • "You’re a twin ? Cool. So, do you two,
    like, do it together ?"
  • "Shit ! That’s my wife at the next
    table over !"
  • "So, how much do you charge ? Can we
    do anal ?"
  • "Dr. Weinberg will be so pleased that
    I was able to get it up for a woman at last."
  • " You’re 31 ? I’m sorry, it’s my
    dyslexia – I thought you were 13."
  • "That pill I put in your drink was
    just Nutra-sweet."
  • "This body has served me well, but is
    rapidly succumbing to the rigors of mortality; yours will be a fitting
    replacement."
  • "Sorry I’m late, those electronic tags
    look flimsy but.
    . . . "
  • "I don’t know what my mates were
    talking about; I’ve seen plenty of lasses uglier than you."
  • "Speaking of conjoined twins, please
    don’t scream when I take this off."
  • "It does as it’s told or else it gets
    the whip again !"
  • "Don’t worry about the camera, it’s
    just to prove you went out with me so my roommate will give me the fifty quid."
  • "Please don’t tell me you’re one of
    those wusses allergic to latex."
  • "Thanks for coming; the coven was
    really getting on my back about finding a sacrifice by Solstice."
  • "Mother said if I brought any more
    filthy whores home, she’d start to kill again so do you have your own place ?"
  • "Could you go get the wine-list ? My penis is
    engorged with blood."
  • "Your brother is a better shag than
    you."
  • "My brother is a better shag than
    you."
  • "But I already promised the rest of the team you’d do them too !"
  • "Ooh, I wish I’d been as pretty as you
    when I was a
    woman."
  • "American President my red, white and
    blue ass ! If that boy weren’t born an Ay-rab, I’m Karl freakin’ Marx !"

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About An Elephant's Child

Like the elephant's child I am filled with insatiable curiousity. I REALLY AM THE PERSON YOUR MOTHER WARNED YOU ABOUT.
This entry was posted in Fun & Games. Bookmark the permalink.

One Response to 26 THINGS FOR MEN NOT TO SAY ON A FIRST DATE.

  1. Barry says:

    Theres most of my old chat up lines in their thats where i,d bin going wrong??

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